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Tuesday 17 October 2023

hoping for a good ending for this year.

 almost another year later. 

i have a really big exam coming up and i am freaking out. I do hope I will pass all components in this exam. I am struggling to keep myself focused doing MCQs and writing manually subjective answers. I can focus on doing VIVA sessions alone. but man i kid you not my speaking skill has degraded a lot.  Like woman, be confident!

Anyway, may Allah grant my wishes of passing this exam and the next. May I finish my course within the stipulated time-frame. Ameen. 

I have 200++ fictional books to read once I finish my exam. I have been staring at my kindle  many times. Sometimes, I take few minutes before going to bed reading books but the guilty feeling overwhelmed me. So yeah. 

I hope my brothers and sisters in Gaza will be protected, their worry and sickness alleviated and know that almost the whole world is on their side. 

From the river to the sea!

Thursday 25 August 2022

Old

 I think I am getting older. Because I enjoy cooking for people. I kid you not. I feel full watching others eat what I cooked. Hahaha. 

Next year will be another year of struggling. Another big exam. I hope I can start studying. Start early, girl!!!

Monday 25 July 2022

Grateful

 Sometimes I do miss the days where problems are small, borderline negligible when I only have to care for myself. My responsibility is only being myself. 

BUT

I can guarantee in ten years time when I look back again to today, my problem is small, miniscule even to some people. I have roof over my head, a loving family, enough money to spend things that I want to buy. I don't have to worry what can I eat tomorrow because I know my fridge is fully stocked. 

I just want to be grateful. I have a family. I have a job. I have a home. 

Oh well, I miss writing things that don't make much sense. I really do feel old this year. 

10 years ago, I did wonder where will I be, what I look like, where I work, how many kids I have, to whom I will be married to... and hey now, ten years later, here I am.. still studying.. lol 

I hope I did not disappoint my previous self. 

I think writing is a form of therapy. It doesn't matter if people are not reading it. But it is very fun reading back my posts.  some major throwback moment reading my previous posts. I think I do want to start writing again. 

Well today, I stayed home instead of working. My 3 year old boy is sick today. 

My son is a very delightful little boy. Full of life. Fun to be with. A little bit clingy with me but so very loving. I hope he will grow up to be a strong, healthy, kind and intelligent man. May Allah protect him, bless him and give him all the kindness the world has to offer. 

Saturday 20 November 2021

Yearly update

 Haha as the title says it is a yearly update, y'all.

Just finished exam and results came out. Just glad I got through that amidst the snot and whatnot of my little one, I thank god, managed to pull it off. Profs were asking whether I get to sleep or not since my eyebags are quite conspicuous. They are my Birkin and Bijan. 

Anyway, I wanted to do sooooo many things once exam has finished. Today I am doing my monthly on-call. 

For the past 1 month, I have listed things that I wanted to do if I passed my first year exam. 

  1. I want to learn a new language and do Duolingo daily
  2. I want to lose some weight (gained a lot due to stress eating)
  3. I want to read books. Managed to finished a book while waiting for result to come out. Yay me!
  4. I want to potty train the little one. 
  5. I want to cook. (in laws came to look after the little one and I cooked for them for the first time in 4 years of being married to A). 
  6. I want to go home, hug mum and dad. 
  7. I want to buy  a kindle to do number (3).
  8. I want to study seriously, no more procrastinating. the time is now.  

Well, COVID-19 is still hitting us hard. I have got my booster shot few days back. My armpit is still very sore. 

Goodbye for now. 

Saturday 10 October 2020

in pandemic

 Hello, 

It really has been awhile right? I just feel the urge to jot something down.

Well we are well into almost the end of 2020. in 2 months, 2020 is going to be over. I hope 2021 will be better for everyone in this world.

As we all knew, in case you lot didn't remember (if you read this many years to come), 2020 was the year we were hit by coronavirus. Many died. As of now, more than 1 million people succumbed to covid-19.

Now we are wishing to be living in isolated islands, New Zealand or Australia or somewhere remote. 

I am in Tawau now. A city in eastcoast of Sabah. We were being hit hard by the pandemic when the cases has just being brought down to 0. We just enjoyed our local places for a breather. Taking our kids to beaches. Meeting friends and what not. Then suddenly boom! Stay at home. All thanks to our dear politicians who were so stupid, so engrossed with power,  irresponsible, selfish and decided to have an election during a pandemic. When there were cases reported to be sporadic in the community. Campaigning not following the new norms. Not wearing masks, Shaking hands with the elderly. And not being quarantined/checked upon arrival to another state from a red zone area. Mind you our cases were in hundreds when they were campaigning around Sabah. Anyone, literally anyone can come and go wherever they want. 

I am frustrated. Many healthcare workers are frustrated. 

I am going to further my study soon. I hope I can be a specialist someday. May Allah ease my way. 

Well a bit of life updates.

I am already 30 year old. 
I have an almost 2 year old son. 

I am probably leaving Tawau soon. 

Tawau has been a lovely place for me. 

I hope when I remember to read my blog, this post will bring me to the lovely memories I have had here. 


Love,

Nawa. 


Thursday 8 February 2018

February two oh one eight

Well this is random.
I used to love to write and tell my thought to anyone willing enough to read silly things that I wrote.
But it has been ages, kan?
So many wonderful things happen in the last what 2 years? or is it 3 years now?

If anyone wants to know or wondering.. I am currently in Tawau, Sabah.
Yeah. Nawwar is in Tawau yo!

Few things that probably one should know also
Nawwar has finally finished her housemanship of 2 years with no period of extension. Lol.
Nawwar also has moved herself to Tawau
Nawwar joined a department she never thought she will join. No It is not obstetrics.
Nawwar has a nephew and a niece now. Later they wont recognise her since she is away most of the time.
Nawwar is missing her family and erm..her husband.
Nawwar is married. Yep
Nawwar also is surprised she got married this early.

Anyway,

Probably the last post for the next few years. Who knows?




Wednesday 30 September 2015

All the best!

The reality is coming down on me fast. I am going to start working real soon. In a week plus I will be back in the hospital setting, getting used to be berated and looked down upon again but this time it will be in front of my people. See it is different back in India where I no longer care because I didn't feel like I belong there. Here it will be different.

The thing is, I am excited as hell to start working which is a good thing I suppose. Add a little bit, no scratch that, not little bit, but very much.. scared. So many what ifs are going inside my mind. So many scenarios I am imagining.

And I hope, really really really hope that the excitement and enthusiasm will not falter away as time goes by.