Sunday, 27 November 2011

A splendid weather.

Well hello there.

It has been a while it seems. You know when every time you are facing difficulties there will always be a point where you really can not take it anymore and say screw it. I will not care anymore.

I have been there
again and again.

See.. I am not the brightest of all students. I need time to study and even that, I fail to memorise or comprehend what I have been reading. I know, that in this profession I am learning to be, persistence is what I need but it is so hard to concentrate. It is not me to read books everyday. I don't even read story books with that consistency. It is not me to always talk about medical stuff. It is not me to spontaneously answer questions thrown at me. My brain lacks in the speed of processing I guess. I sometimes doubt myself what really am I doing here really. Well if you have never ever question yourself  with what are doing right now well then good for you. I have doubted myself and have been feeling what a let down I am when I failed a paper. when I failed to answer a simple question. when people succeed making me feel like a complete loser just because I am not able to deliver an excellent answer.

but again and again,

having a good friend saying it's OK. we have all been there. you'll be good.
having a family saying things will get better. it will not always be like this. we love you.
having a complete stranger saying i pray to god you will be an excellent doctor that will be able to serve your country, your religion and your community.

is a comfort of some sort.

I hope I will be able to realize that I am lucky to have this opportunity and stop second guessing myself.

Salaam Maal Hijrah everyone.